Wednesday, December 12, 2012

Nick Cannon Reveals He and Mariah Have Sex To Her Music

I wish we could claim I'm surprised by Nick Cannon‘s super TMI overshares on Howard Stern yesterday morning. Scandalized, yes, but not surprised. Doesn’t it make a lot of sense that Nick and Mariah Carey would make love to Mimi’s music?

Doesn’t it somehow feel right? Everyone else in the world has done it at some point; why shouldn’t they get the opportunity as well? That’s where I draw the line, though. Cannon’s admission that, uh, he masturbates to Mariah’s ballad “Hero” or how he and Mariah abstained from sex before marriage were a bit much. “It was Mariah Carey. If Mariah Carey gave a bad blowjob, I’m still going in,” Cannon said by way of explaining their abstinence. “Either way she’s still one of the most beautiful women on the planet.” Oh jeez, why did you have to call to mind a Mariah Carey blowjob? Now there is no way Mariah won’t scream at you over this!

On the other hand, Nick’s so friendly and goofy during the interview, we’re sure Mariah will only berate at him for a few hours. And let’s be honest…he might like. That doesn’t mean the rest of us can’t drop our monocles over the details of their sex life. Honestly, it’s almost like Jay-Z blowing up Beyonce‘s sexual spot. No,…forget we said that. That would never, ever, ever happen. Ever.


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